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How to Create a Lasting Bond with your Puppy

How to Create a Lasting Bond with your Puppy - Happyoodles.com

Over the years I have come across first time puppy parents that were disappointed with the relationship they had with their young puppy. They felt like they were unable to form a bond with them. This is not an uncommon feeling. As a new puppy parent or someone that has not had a puppy in the house for a long time you might not realize that creating a bond with your puppy takes time. Join us as we discuss our need to bond and what we did to bond with our puppy.

The Need to Bond

We’re social animals because we need other people to survive “

The Science of Human Bonding – Prof. Vivian Zayas, psychology at Cornell University

According to Zayas, human bonding is an outcome of evolution. By creating bonds early in life we are able to secure what we need for survival. For us as individuals, the bonding process starts before birth, while we are still completely dependent on our mothers. The bond with our primary caretakers then continues after birth and throughout our lives. Overtime our need to bond develops to include people beyond our primary caretakers, such as friends and romantic partners.

But beyond human survival the need to bond is also an emotional need.  This is because we have evolved so that the things we need to do for survival is also pleasurable. Since it’s important to maintain these relationships to survive, the interactions with the people we bond with are also pleasurable.

Human Canine Bonding

So we talked about why as humans we need to bond with other people but that doesn’t explain why we want to bond with our dogs. To understand this desire we need to look at a small study completed by Takefumi Kikusui, an animal behaviorist at Azabu University in Sagamihara, Japan. In the study Kikusui showed that when human and dogs gazed in to each other’s eyes the level of oxytocin sometimes called the “love hormone” rose in both the owner and dog.

So much like the human to human bond, we want to bond with our dogs because it makes us feel good.

Of course as dog lovers we don’t need a study to know that one of the great things about dogs is their ability to understand us and always be there for us. Unlike humans, dogs show us a greater level of unconditional love, plus they don’t judge us. Wouldn’t it be great is everyone was like that?

Can a dog smile? Check out our post to find out.

The Power of Bonding with your Puppy

So, thinking about our need to bond, had me reminiscing about a time when Bella was around 11 weeks old. She was still pretty small at the time. She couldn’t have been more than 7 pounds. We had her out on our back deck which has a railing around it and two gates to keep her in. This wasn’t the first time she was loose on the deck. We would let run around on the deck whenever the weather was nice enough. This allowed her to get some of her puppy energy out.

But this time I guess she was feeling more confident with her new surroundings. So every so often she would go up to the railing and stick her head through. Most of the rails were too close for her to put more than her head through. But this one spot on the railing was slightly warped and she managed to squeeze her body through.     

Running loose

I had just turned my back to pick up a toy when the kids, who were playing with her, started yelling that Bella was loose in the yard. Our yard is not fenced in and there are woods behind our house. There are also fox and other wild animals that live in the woods, which is why we only allowed Bella to play on the deck.  At her small size she would be a tasty treat.  

You could tell she was absolutely thrilled to be loose and loving the freedom.  She was completely unaware of the dangers nearby. The kids tried calling her but she didn’t listen.  They tried to capture her but it just turned into a game of chase and Bella was winning. 

I went inside to get her leash and some treats to lure her back when my husband came out.  He called her name with a loud, commanding voice.  She immediately stopped the chase, than she ran to him.   The fun and games were over.

Why did she listen?

Why did she listen to my husband and not the kids?  Some might say that it was the fact that my husband is a male therefore he shows more strength then the kids do.  But I believe it’s because he was the one she bonded with first.

After all it was my husband that slept on the kitchen floor next to Bella the first few nights of her living with us.  Although the rest of us fed her, played with her and trained with her, he was the one that protected her and comforted her when she was most scared.  

Now-a-days Bella sleeps in her bed next to my husband’s side of the bed. So she is still close to him when she sleeps. She also enjoys the occasional nap on the couch with him.

11 Ways to Bond With Your Puppy

The below suggested ways to bond with your puppy are based on having a puppy that was not abused. If you have a rescue puppy that was abused you will need to work towards basic trust before being able to bond with them.

1. Start the Bonding Process Early

The best time for a puppy to bond with you is between 8 and 12 weeks of age. This is when they are most open to new things. In reality you start the bonding process as soon as you bring them home regardless of their age.

To get a jump start on the bonding process plan to bring your puppy home when you have a few days to devote solely to them. This means that even if you work from home you should still take time off. Taking a week or two off not only helps to bond with your puppy but it also leads to quicker potty training.

Keep in mind that the first week or two is a difficult time for your new puppy. They may have just left the only family they knew.

2. Spend time with your puppy

I am sure you have heard that dogs are pack animals. This means that they want to live in a close family setting where they are protected and cared for by the pack. It also means they want to be around you all the time, even if you are not actively engaging with them at the moment.

Here are a few ways to be close with your puppy when you are not engaging with them.

  • A very popular suggestion these days is to tether your puppy to you using a 6 foot leash. This way the puppy is always with you no matter where go. While this may work for some, I just couldn’t see myself being tied to my puppy all day. Also I believe a puppy needs to be alone for at least nap times so they do not develop separation anxiety.
  • Instead, I gated the entrances to the kitchen, made sure the kitchen was puppy proofed and moved my computer to the kitchen. This way I would be near her when I was checking emails or trying to get some work done. Not that I got much work done the first month. But it did afford me the ability to be close to her and keep an eye on her potty signs.
  • If you don’t have a kitchen or other small area that can be closed off and puppy proofed consider getting a playpen and place it near where you are during most of the day. This way your puppy can see you.

3. Train your puppy

Training your puppy is different than playing with them or just spending time with them. When you train your puppy you are showing them you are the leader. All dogs either want to be lead or be the leader themselves. You must show them that you are their leader and protector.

Start the training process with the 5 basic commands that every puppy should learn. Sit, Stay, Come, Leave it, and down.

Before you can start to teach them these commands you need to teach them their new name. This one is easy. Just call their name in a happy, but strong voice. When they look at you give them a small treat. Repeat until they consistently respond whenever their name is called.

Whichever training method you choose, always make sure it is a positive one. Dogs will not bond with someone they are afraid of.

4. Play with your puppy

You might have guessed by now that the best way to bond with your puppy and to have a happy pup, is to be around them. But you don’t want to just be around them, you want them to enjoy being around you. You can do this by playing with them.

There are a number of games you can play with a puppy. Hide and seek, fetch, and chase just to name a few. Bella’s favorite play time activity was the flirt pole. You can make your own or buy one. Since Bella was small we could play with her inside the house using the flirt pole. It also enabled us to control how much she ran. Bella loved chasing the soft prey.

Whatever games you decide to play just make sure it doesn’t involve jumping. According to the American Kennel Club dogs under a year old can become hurt if they jump. Therefore while your puppy is still growing you need to be careful about how you play with them.

5. Work on socializing your puppy

Puppy socializing is not only important to your puppy’s development, but it is also a great way to bond with your puppy. Taking the time to teach your puppy about their new world in a calm and controlled environment teaches them that you will lead and protect them when they are scared. Here are 5 safe and easy ways to socialize your puppy.

When socializing your puppy there are 10 common mistakes people tend to make. You can learn all about them here.

6. Explore with them

Your puppy is trying to learn about their new world so exploring that world is a big part of puppyhood. Make sure you are part of this exploration. You can do this by taking them for walks or taking them with you on trips. Just make sure it is done in a safe manner. You don’t want to take your puppy anywhere they can pick up an illness before they are fully vaccinated.

If you have a yard, you can walk around the yard exploring with your puppy. If you don’t have a yard, explore different parts of your home with them. Once they are fully vaccinated you can take them on short walks. Keep them on a short leash so they get used to staying by your side, but let them smell and explore the area.

7. Spend time grooming your puppy

Mother dogs will lick their puppies to clean them after birth and also to stimulate them. This is their way of taking care of their puppies. You can achieve the same response from your puppy by brushing them with a soft brush. Not only does this teach them that you care but for long haired breeds it’s important to get them used to being groomed.

Did you know that studies have shown that just 15 minutes of petting can decrease a shelter dog’s heart rate and increases their positive state of relaxation? Just image what it would do for your puppy.

8. Hand feed your puppy

Hand feeding does a number of things; first it teaches your puppy that food comes from you; it also teaches your puppy to trust you. They have to get close to eat the food from your hand.

It also shows that you care. When Bella first came home she did not want to eat. We all took turns sitting on the floor with her food and feeding it to her. For some reason she did not trust the bowl that her food was in, but she did trust us not to harm her.

9. Learn how to communicate with your dog

You and your dog have th18e ability to communicate with each other through movement, sounds and looks. I know when Bella needs to go out because she sits by the door. If we don’t notice her, she starts to cry. I know when she wants my attention because she stares at me until I give it to her. When she is hungry she paws at me. You and your dog can also communicate with each other. You just need to learn how to read your puppy’s signals.

If you are new to having a dog, there are books that can help you learn the many ways that dogs communicate with us. How to Speak Dog: A Guide to Decoding Dog Language is actually geared towards kids, but has useful information for people of all ages who want to learn to communicate with their canines.

Note: As an Amazon affiliate I earn from qualifying purchases.

10. Have them sleep near you

As I mentioned in my story above, my husband slept on the kitchen floor the first week Bella lived with us. At first we tried placing her in a crate next to our bed. However, after spending time in a shelter and a road trip up north, Bella did like being crated. So instead of letting her cry in her crate at night we adapted.

For the first week she slept in our gated kitchen next to my husband. After that we slowly transitioned her to sleeping in her crate next to our bed. We did not force the crate on her. We wanted to make sure she felt comfortable in her new house first.

Where your puppy sleeps is completely up to you, however I recommend that they are allowed to sleep near you. This will help strenghten your bond with them.

A word on crate training: I do believe that crate training is important for all dogs to go through. Not only do their crates keep them safe when they are a puppy, but if they ever need to spend time at the vets they will need to be crated. So I feel its better that they see the crate as an acceptable place to be early on, rather than a scary place later in life.

11. Be consistent

You might be wondering what being consistent has to do with bonding with your puppy. It has to do with developing trust. If every day you walk and feed your puppy at the same time, they learn to trust that you will provide for their daily needs. If sometimes you go for a walk but other times you don’t, the puppy doesn’t know what to expect and will not trust that you will take care of them.

12. Respect your puppy

Get to know your puppy’s likes and dislikes. If you know that your puppy dislikes something, like a certain sound, don’t make the sound. Respect is a two way street. If you want their respect you need to also respect them.

How long does it take for a puppy to bond with you?

Some people claim that they bonded with their puppy the day they came home. While this may be true, for most people it takes a couple of weeks or more for your puppy to be bonded to you. It also depends on what you view as being bonded. My definition of bonding is when your puppy wants to stay close to you and comes as soon as you call them.

Don’t be discouraged if you feel that you are not bonding with your puppy as quickly as you like. The type of breed your puppy is will factor into how quick and strong your bond will be. Breeds that were bred to work with humans will develop a stronger bond then breeds that are bred to work alone. Of course that doesn’t mean the independent breeds won’t bond to you, it just may look different then you are expecting.

5 Things to Avoid When You Are Trying to Bond With Your Puppy

1. Don’t lose your patience

Try to keep your patience with your new puppy. They are just babies when they first come to live with you. They are unable to control certain behaviors, like chewing and bathroom accidents. If your puppy becomes fearful of you because you yell at them when they make a mistake, it will be harder for you to create that lasting bond.

2. Limit the amount of time your puppy spends with other dogs in your home

If you have another dog in the house you want to make sure your puppy does not bond to the other dog before they bond to you. Dogs tend to form bonds with other dogs quicker than they bond with humans.

To make sure this doesn’t happen, keep the puppy close to you during the first couple of weeks they are living with you. Don’t use the other dog as a babysitter for the puppy.

3. Spending all your time with your puppy

I know, didn’t I just say in the 11 ways to bond with your puppy that you should spent a lot of time with your puppy. Yes I did, but although spending time with your puppy will help you bond with them quicker, it can also lead to puppy separation anxiety. So although you should spend a lot of time together you also need time apart.

The best time for the alone time is during nap time. Puppies need to take a few naps a day, otherwise they will to start to misbehave. Nap times should come at the same time each day. Having a routine that leads up to nap time makes the process easier. Don’t forget to let them out just before putting them in their crate. Place your dog’s crate or safe area in a quiet part of the home away from you when it’s time for a nap.

4. Unrealistic Expectations

Try not to have unrealistic expectations of what your puppy can do. It takes time for your puppy to learn the rules of the house. Having unrealistic expectations can lead to the puppy blues. Plus if your puppy senses you are unhappy with him, he may shy away from you out of fear.

5. Don’t rush the process

Bonding with your puppy takes time. They first need to feel comfortable in their new home, and then they need to learn to trust you. Once those two things have happen your bond will begin to grow.

Make sure you are not forcing the bonding on your puppy. Let them do it in their own time.

It’s also important not to become discouraged. Your puppy will be able to tell if you are upset with them.

Resources:

Puppy Blues: Dealing with the Regret

Getting a puppy is an exciting time, especially if you are a first time puppy parent.  I bet while you were waiting to bring home your puppy you thought about what it would be like to live with them. Maybe you were dreaming of puppy cuddles and kisses or a sweet playful puppy who adores you? Why wouldn’t you? Puppies portrayed on TV always seem to be so well behaved. But the reality of living with a puppy can be very different from what we see on TV. When this happens people can get the “Puppy Blues”.

What Are the Puppy Blues?

You may have heard the term puppy blues in the past, but not known what it meant.  Or maybe you are feeling overwhelmed or regret and don’t understand why.  The most common reason the puppy blues happen is when life with your puppy doesn’t turn out the way you thought it would. This can affect everyone differently. For some people they may feel sad, depressed or lonely, others may feel anxious or overwhelmed. It’s not unusual to want to cry.  You may feel like your life will never be the same as it was before the puppy. Some will feel regret and want to return the puppy. Others still will start to have second thoughts about whether they were ready to get a puppy in the first place.

Whatever you are feeling know that you are not alone. Those first couple of weeks is the hardest but it does get better.

What Causes the Puppy Blues?

So you may be wondering what causes the puppy blues.  After all you were so excited to get your new puppy.  So what changed? The causes will differ by person but the most common reasons are:

  1. First time they are responsible for another life. Young puppies are like babies, they need a lot of care in the first few weeks. This can be very stressful when it is new.
  2. Unrealistic expectations of life with a puppy. Even if you did your research, chances are you probably didn’t get an accurate picture of what it’s like to care for a puppy.
  3. Sleep Deprivation – It’s common for puppies to cry the first few nights in their new home. Plus they can’t hold their bladder for more than a few hours at night. All this translates into sleepless nights for the first couple of weeks.

More contributing factors

  1. Potty training issues – For first-time puppy parents potty training can be hard. Check out our post on How to potty train a puppy fast
  2. Financial commitments – Between puppy supplies and the cost of vaccines, puppies can be expensive in their first year.
  3. Behavioral Issues – Puppies don’t come trained, but with some help you can train your own puppy. Here are some tips on how to train a puppy
  4. Damage caused by puppy – The best thing you can do for you and your puppy is to provide him with a safe place to play. I recommend using an exercise pen that attaches to a crate.
  5. Feeling like you can’t bond with your puppy- You might feel like you are unable to feel close to your puppy. Just remember that bonding does take time.
  6. Increased workload – There is no denying that puppies take a lot of work in the beginning. But it does get better
  7. Dog/child interaction – There is nothing sweeter that a child and their dog but during the puppy biting stage the two don’t necessarily get along.
  8. Loss of freedom – When puppies are young, they need a lot of attention.

Can You Get Puppy Blues?

Absolutely! I know I did the first week we brought home our puppy. Since this was not my first puppy as an adult, I thought I knew everything I needed to know about taking care of a puppy. But our previous dog, Molly was 4 months old when we brought her home. Although she was still a puppy we missed a lot of the early puppy behaviors, like chewing on everything and biting us all the time. Plus with Molly, it was just my husband and me in the house. This time around we had two school aged kids to care for too.

The funny thing is we chose to get a puppy because we were hoping it would help with some of the stress our family was feeling. We had read that dogs were great stress relievers for kids. I can tell you the first few weeks of Bella living with us were anything but stress free. I worried about everything.

How Long Do the Puppy Blues Last?

This really depends on the person, but the blues should go away once you are able to gain some control over the situation. Generally the first two or three weeks are the hardest. This is when you are getting little sleep and you are still working on potty training. After the first three weeks your puppy should be going to sleep without crying. They may even be able to sleep about 4 hours in a row.

When Do Puppies Get Easier?

By the time your puppy is 6 months old they should be fairly easy to live with. But that doesn’t mean they are hard to live with all the time before then. As with children, puppies reach developmental milestones as they grow up. With each milestone they attain your puppy will be easier to handle.

First three weeks

The first three weeks your puppy is with you is always the hardest. During this time they are adjusting to a new home, with new people and rules. They are learning what is acceptable and what is not. It is very important during this time to be consistent with your training. By the end of the first three weeks your puppy should be going to sleep at night without crying. This is your first big hurtle to overcome with your puppy and once you are there life gets a little bit easier.

Three months old

By the time they are three months they should know to go potty outside. Although they may still have an accident on occasion it should be the exception, not the norm. They should also know basic commands like sit, stay, come and leave it. Once you hit these milestones, life with your puppy will get a lot easier. If you are having a hard time potty training your puppy check out these potty training mistakes people make.

Four months old

When they are 4 months old they should have all their puppy vaccinations. This means you can start taking them out with you. This new found freedom to get out of the house will be a big relief for you and your pup.

Six months old

According to PetMD somewhere between 4 and 6 months old your puppy will go through getting their adult teeth. During this time the puppy may bite a lot making them difficult to be around. But by 6 month the biting and nipping should stop.

Six to 12 months

This is the time puppies go through their teenage years. During this time they may chose not to listen to you, but it does get better.

One Year

By the time they turn one they should be the dog you always knew they could be.

How to Handle the Puppy Blues

As I mentioned above I also had the puppy blues. I wasn’t completely sold on getting another dog in the first place. Then I became the main person to train our new puppy since I was the one that grew up with dogs. This increased the pressure I was already feeling about caring for this small helpless creature. In order to cope I had to come up with a plan that would work for everyone. I will let you in on my secrets to dealing with the puppy blues.

1. Manage your expectations

First you need to manage your expectations. In fact, instead of thinking how wonderful it will be to have a puppy think about the worst case scenario. This way when reality hits everything will seem easier.

But seriously all puppies bite and chew. Their sharp puppy teeth really hurt and can even draw blood. Plus they often don’t want to eat the first day; they run around the house, don’t listen to you and have accidents. They rarely come trained and they can’t understand what you are saying.

Oh, and did I mention that they eat stuff that is not food? Our puppy had a thing for the plastic caps on the milk bottles. She loved chewing them. No matter how hard I tried to keep them from her, she always seems to find them.

Curious about what other dogs have chewed? Check out the post Crazy Things that Dogs will Chew

But if you are prepared for all this then you can manage the bad behaviors a little easier.

Do yourself a favor and get an exercise pen. If you are planning to crate train get one that attaches to their crate. Keeping your puppy safe and away from anything they can destroy will help keep your sanity. Also be prepared with age appropriate chews and a plan on how you will handle the biting. You can see how we handled it in our post How to Stop a Puppy from Biting.

2. Limit where your puppy can roam

I touched on this above already but you should limit where your puppy can roam until they are completely trust worthy. This will cut down on a lot of their bad behaviors and also your stress. We used gates to keep our puppy in the kitchen with us. This allowed us to keep an eye on her and make sure there was nothing that could harm her. Plus it keeps the messes in a confided, easy to clean place. As I mentioned above you can also use an exercise pen.

3. Share the work

I am very thankful that my husband took on a large share of the work to take care of Bella. During the first few nights when Bella would not sleep he was the one sleeping on the floor in the kitchen next to her. That allowed the rest of the family to get some sleep. I in turn watched over her during the day. If possible, enlist someone to help care for the puppy.

4. Take a break

When you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed, make sure to take a break from your puppy. Or better yet schedule nap times for your puppy. Puppies need down time too throughout the day. Place puppies in their crate for an hour or two to get some sleep. During this time take a walk or something else that will relax you.

If it’s not nap time and you need a break take them out for a walk in the yard or other safe place. Dogs love to smell and explore stuff. Your puppy will be too occupied by the sights and sound to misbehave. Plus the exercise will do wonders for their mood.

Another option is to enlist a family member, friend or even a pet sitter to spend time with your puppy so you can take a break.

5. Seek out puppy training advice

If you are having trouble training your puppy, consider taking them to puppy kindergarten. Puppy kindergarten is a training classes geared for puppies. The dog trainer will teach you how to train your puppy. Plus it’s a safe and easy way to socialize your puppy with other dogs and for you to talk with other puppy parents.

6. Talk to someone

What’s the old saying ‘Misery loves company.” This is so true. Find a friend who will listen to you about your puppy issues without judgement.

Or seek out other puppy owners. While your puppy-less friends might not understand what you are going through other puppy parents will. If all else fails check out new puppy parent support groups on Facebook.

If talking to someone is not your thing start a journal to document the journey. This is a great way to look back and see all you have accomplished.

7. Celebrate the successes

This brings us to celebrating your successes. Not every day will be perfect but if you celebrate the good days it makes the not so good days bearable.

8. Get some sleep

Don’t expect your puppy to settle in the first night. Although some may settle down quickly most will miss their previous homes. Be compassionate and think about how your puppy might be feeling. Oh and forget about crate training the first few nights. Your puppy needs to know you will be there to protect them while they sleep. Although I don’t suggest that you have your puppy sleep with you in bed (unless this is what you want going forward). Do try to come up with a sleeping arrangement that keeps your puppy safe and close to you. This will enable you both to get a good night’s sleep.

When you are ready to start crate training check out our post on Crate Training A Puppy – Made Easy, How to Crate Train a Puppy: 10 Mistakes to Avoid and Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night? How to Make it Stop

9. Create a routine with naps included

Puppies train best when they have a routine. Puppies can’t tell time but the can learn that after a walk it’s time to take a nap. If you follow the same routine every day they will quickly learn what is expected of them. When deciding on your schedule make sure to schedule two nap times. Plan the naps for one in the morning and one in the afternoon for about 2 hours each. Naps should follow some type of exercise, food and time outside so they will be ready for the nap.

10. Remind yourself it will get better

When things get tough remember that this is only temporary. Your puppy will learn to sleep through the night. They will stop chewing on all your stuff and they will learn to potty outside. The great thing about puppies is they grow up fast. Which means the issues you are having today will get better in a month or so.

11. Seek professional help

Sometimes you just need a little extra help to deal with the blues. If the stress becomes more then you can deal with, make sure to seek out a professional. They will have the knowledge and experience to help you.  

Can a dog smile?  Many Dog Trainers and Animal Behaviorists will tell you that dogs cannot smile, at least not in the true sense of a smile.  But I am not so sure they are correct.  Check out why I think some dogs can smile.

Puppy Socialization

Don’t forget about socializing your puppy. To learn more about the benefits of puppy socialization check out these posts:

Potty Training a Puppy: Made Easy

Potty Training a Puppy: Made Easy

One of the first things a new puppy owner wants to know is how to housetrain a puppy…..fast. For many people, teaching their puppy not to go in the house seems close to impossible. But in reality potty training a puppy is pretty easy. All you need to do is follow their natural instincts.

Puppies naturally want to keep their space clean. This means they will look for an area away from where they sleep and play to eliminate. By using this knowledge, along with a few tricks I have learned over the years, you can make potty training your puppy a snap.

Join us as we look at some tricks and tips on how to make potty training your puppy quick and easy.

The Puppy Blues – Dealing with a new puppy can be hard, especially if you are a first time puppy parent.  You might even feel like you made a mistake by getting a puppy. Let’s face it puppies generally come untrained, can’t understand you yet and don’t know the rules of the house.  But it does get better. It’s important to understand that you are not alone.  Check out my post on Puppy Blues: Dealing with Regret to see how I managed my own puppy blues.

Tips and Tricks for

Potty Training a Puppy

I have grown up with dogs all my life, but it wasn’t until I was an adult that I had to potty train a puppy. Our first dog together was a 7 year old rescue that was previously trained to go to the back door and bark when he wanted to go out. So that was an easy transition for us. Unfortunately, he died a few years after we adopted him.

A few months later we decided to get another dog. This time we tried our hand at getting a puppy. Molly was 4 months old when we brought her home. Previously she lived in a crate at a puppy store. Based on what we knew about her, she was a puppy mill puppy. Because she had lived in a crate most of her life she was use to eliminating in the crate. Of course the whole point of crate training is that they won’t go where they sleep but if there is nowhere else to go that is what they will do.

On top of that we both worked out of the house full time. But we were lucky in that, since Molly was 4 months old she could hold her bladder longer. She was also very happy to have a home away from the store. Unlike young puppies that are sad when they first leave their family, Molly was more than ready to start her new life with us. This enabled her to bond to us quickly. She also wanted to please us. All of this worked in our favor.

Tip #1 – Dogs like to go where other dogs have gone

Since it was less than three months from the time we lost Charlie until we brought home Molly, Charlie’s scent was everywhere. Including the backyard spot where he would go to the bathroom. Even though Molly was new to going to the bathroom in a yard she instinctively knew where to go because she could smell him. We also shifted our schedules so that she never went more than three hours without being let out. Molly had a total of two accidents. Both of which were our fault and were due to waiting too long to let her out.

Let’s fast forward to our current pup Bella. We brought Bella home when she was 9 weeks old. Prior to her coming to live with us, she lived with her mom and siblings with a foster family. It is possible that the foster family started potty training before we got her.

Unlike Molly, Bella was too young to hold her bladder for long but we also work from home now so it was less of an issue. Just like with Molly, Bella knew where to go in our yard because she could smell the scent of our previous dog.

Now if you don’t have another dog you will not have the potty scents in your yard. To remedy this you can use their own waste to guide them to where they should go. If they have an accident in the house or used a pee pad, bring the waste outside to the area you want them to go in. Leave it there for a little while so the next time they go they will be attracted to the scent. Make sure to clean up any poop before they use the area again.

I previously suggested that you may want to invite a dog, you know well, to come over and christen the potty spot. But you need to be very careful with this approach since your puppy will not be fully vaccinated yet. Although it may work, as it did with my previous dogs, it does carry the risk of making your puppy sick. It is much safer to use you own dogs waste. Also remember to clean up any poop before your puppy comes home.

Warning: Be very carefully about inviting another dog to your home. Feces can carry diseases. Since your puppy will not be fully vaccinated you need to ensure the visiting dog is healthy and up-to-date on vaccines.

Tip # 2 – Create a dedicated potty spot

As you might have realized from tip # 1 we use a dedicated potty spot. I highly recommend that you do too. A dedicated potty spot can accomplish a few things.

  1. Keeps the rest of your yard poop free
  2. Makes it easier to clean up the poop
  3. Teaches your puppy to take care of business when they are in that spot

Never play with your puppy in the potty spot. Play time should take place somewhere else.

For ideas and tips on how to create a dedicated potty spot check out our post: Dog Potty Area Guide: Tips and Ideas

Tip # 3 – Take time off to train your puppy

Plan to take time off from work in order to focus on your new puppy. Not only will this time allow you to work on potty training a puppy, but it will also give you time to bond with your puppy. A puppy that is left home alone will not be able to learn the rules of the house from you.

Tip # 4 – Create a schedule

As I mentioned in Tip # 1 Molly had a couple of accidents, so did Bella in the beginning. In both cases the accidents happened when we lost track of time and did not let them out at the appropriate times. By creating a schedule and sticking to it you will remember to take them out every couple of hours.

Everyone’s schedule will look different. But when creating your schedule here are a few things to keep in mind. Puppies should be taken out for a potty break:

  • When they get up in the morning
  • 10 to 15 minutes after they eat or drink
  • Before and after naps
  • At night before going to bed
  • After extended play times
  • Anytime that they are taken out of their crate or playpen.

Now look at the schedule. Are there any times that go beyond two hours? If there is, schedule a few more potty breaks so you never go more than two hours in between at least in the beginning. Of course if you still have accidents make the time between potty breaks shorter. As your puppy matures they will be able to hold it longer so you should gradually increase the time between potty breaks.

Here are a couple more thoughts to think about when creating your schedule.

  • Smaller dogs have smaller bladders so they may need to go more than a larger dog.
  • Puppies, especially in the beginning are easier to crate train when they are on a schedule.

Tip # 5 – Pay Attention

In addition to creating a schedule make sure to pay attention to your puppy. This will help you to learn the signs that they need to go.

And there are signs, but more on that in the next tip.

One of the recommended ways to keep track of your puppy is to keep them on a leash at all times and attach the leash to you. This way your puppy will never be more than a few feet away.

While this may work it wasn’t something I could see myself doing. Instead we kept her gated in the kitchen, which is on the small side. That way I could keep my eye on her even as I was taking care of other stuff.

I also didn’t want her to develop separation anxiety. I wondered if having my puppy attached to me all the time would cause her not to want to be alone. Being comfortable with being alone is an important life lesson that a puppy needs to learn. Please read my post on how to prevent separation anxiety in puppies to learn more.

Tip #6 – Learn the signs that indicate they need to go

I mentioned earlier that our Golden Retriever, Charlie would go downstairs to the back door and bark whenever he needed to go out. We knew once he started heading down the stairs that he needed to go out but if we didn’t move fast enough he would make sure we were aware of his needs.

Molly was a quiet dog and was much less demanding. She would simply go to the back door and whine.

Bella just goes to the back door and stares at it. If we don’t notice she will eventually tell us by crying but most of the time she is hard to miss standing in front of the door. All dogs will eventually learn to tell you when they need to go out, but when they are a puppy they don’t yet know how to tell you.

This is why you need to learn their signs. Dogs by nature don’t like going to the bathroom near where they sleep and play. So they will look for a place away from their area. Many puppies will sneak away to a quiet spot like under a chair or behind the couch to do their dirty deed. This is what Bella did the two times she had an accident in the house.

Signs that a dog needs to potty:

  • Start sniffing around looking for a perfect spot to go. Dogs often like to pee on top of other smells.
  • Abrupt change in activity. If they are playing one minute but then starts looking for something, it may be that they are looking for a place to go.
  • Circling – Dogs often do tight circles before deciding to poop
  • Going to a previously soiled area
  • Start to whine
  • Lick themselves in the groin area
  • Go to the door and wait
  • Go back and forth to the door and you
  • Scratch at the door
  • Bark
  • Become restless

How do I train my dog to tell me he needs to go outside?

Caldwell’s Potty Bells available at Amazon.com
 

The easiest way to train your puppy to tell you that he needs to go out is to use “Potty Bells”. Potty bells are bells that are attached to a long strap with a hand that goes over the door knob. The idea behind Potty Bells is to train your dog to ring the bells when they want to go out.

As an Amazon affiliate I earn a commission from qualifying purchases.

How to train your dog to use Potty Bells

Place the “Potty Bells” on the door handle you use most often to let your dog out. Next whenever you take your puppy out to go potty, gently touch the bells using their paw. At the same time give the command “outside”. Overtime they should associate the act with going out to go potty.

Many people have had success with teaching their dog to use potty bells but they are not for everyone. Some dogs will want to play with the potty bells. Others will ring the bells whenever they want to go out even if they don’t need to go potty. Also in an active household you may be hearing the bells all the time.

Tip# 7 – Where you get your puppy matters

As I mentioned in my Puppy Potty Training Mistakes post, where you get your puppy really does matter when it comes to potty training a puppy. A reputable dog breeder will begin potty training before they are scheduled to go home. This early potty training makes it easier for you to potty train them once they are home. Instead of teaching them the concept of going outside, you are just reinforcing what they have already began to learn.

However if you get your puppy from a puppy mill or kennel there is a greater chance that they did not receive potty training. Even worst, they may have lived their life in a cage with no place else to go but where they sleep and eat.

In our post How to Find a Reputable Dog Breeder we show you 16 ways to tell a good breeder from a bad breeder.

Tip# 8 – Don’t use puppy pee pads

Let me start by saying I am guilty of using pee pads for Bella. It is the first time I had ever used pee pads. But after using them I realized it was a mistake. I believed we confused her by giving her mixed messages.

One minute we were telling her it was ok to pee on the pad in the house, the next we were telling her to pee outside. This meant we were being very inconsistent with her training messages. And the number one rule in puppy training is consistency.

Tip# 9 – Getting them to go when outside

A typical complaint people have when potty training a puppy is that the puppy goes inside the house right after they were outside. There are a few issues that might cause this.

  • If the dog is allowed to use puppy pads they may assume that going in the house is what you want them to do
  • It may be that the puppy was not ready to go when they were outside
  • Or it could be that they were distracted when they were outside

The answer to the first issue is addressed in Tip # 7. The rest can be handled by allowing your puppy time to walk around for a while. Just like with humans, exercise helps get a puppy’s digestive system moving. The trick is to give them some exercise but to get them back to the potty spot before they are ready to go. To master this you will need to pay attention to timing.

Tip # 10 – Learn the proper way to use a crate when potty training a puppy

I often hear people say they are crate training to potty train a puppy. Crate training and potty training is not the same thing. When you crate train you are teaching a puppy to be comfortable in an enclosed space. This is important if you want to travel with your dog or if they ever need to stay at a veterinarian’s office. Potty training is teaching your puppy to go to the bathroom in a preferred place.

You can’t potty train a puppy if they are always in the crate. Yes they won’t go inside their crate but that doesn’t mean you are teaching them not to go in the house when they are out of the crate. They have to be out of the crate to understand that they shouldn’t pee in the house.

The only time a puppy should be crated is when you are unable to watch them during the day or at night when you are sleeping. If you are unable to use gates to keep her close consider using an exercise pen to keep her nearby and contained.

To learn more about how to crate train your puppy read our posts Crate Training a Puppy – Made Easy and How to Crate Train a Puppy: 10 Mistakes to Avoid

Tip# 11 – Clean up accidents completely

Like I said in tip #1 dogs prefer to go to the bathroom where there are potty scents already. This means if they had an accident in your home they will want to return to that area the next time too. So it is really important to thoroughly clean up the accident area.

Questions on Potty Training a Puppy

How long does it take to potty train a puppy?

How long it will take to potty train a puppy depends on a few things, the biggest one being how consistent you are with your training. We potty trained Bella in less than two weeks. If you are not consistent or you do not follow the tips listed above it can take between 4 and 6 months to fully potty train a puppy. Maybe even a year.

Sometimes potty training issues are caused they health issues like an Urinary Tract Infection (UTI). Make sure to discuss potty training progress with your veterinarian during your regularly scheduled puppy check-up visits. 

Should I wake my puppy up to pee at night?

Young puppies will not be able to hold their bladder all night long. So if you don’t want an accident in the middle of the night it is best to plan to take them out once or twice per night until they are older.

Should I punish my puppy for peeing or pooping in the house?

Although you should never punish your puppy for having an accident in the house you can let them know that it is an unwanted behavior. You can do this by saying “No” in a loud, stern voice if you catch them in the act. But try not to scare them. You want them to realize you are unhappy but not to the point that they become afraid of you.

Do You Have the Right Tools?

Having the right stuff for your new puppy is half the battle.  Take a look at the 7 essentials you need to care for your puppy in our post What You Need for a New Puppy

Here is a list of the posts that were mentioned above:

Thank you for reading

Potty Training a Puppy – Made Easy

Here are 10 Secrets to Easy Puppy Training

Puppy Training: Learn the Secret of Easy Puppy Training

Getting a puppy is a great experience. However, most new puppy owners do not realize that puppies come untrained. An untrained puppy is both a good thing and a bad thing. On one hand you get to train them the way you want. On the other hand you need to know how to train them first. There many books and websites that will show you the best methods on how to train a puppy. But they are often missing some very important parts of puppy training. Let us fill you in on the secrets to easy puppy training.

Puppy Training: 10 Secrets to Easy Puppy Training

The Secrets to Easy Puppy Training

Puppy training is really not that hard to do. You do not need to be a professional dog trainer to train your puppy. Nor should you send your puppy to a dog trainer to be trained. If you send your puppy away for training, they will learn to listen to the trainer, but not to you.

So why do some people make it look so easy while others struggle to train their pup? This is because the people who make it look simple know the secrets to easy puppy training. These secrets will help you with every type of training from housetraining to agility training. You just need to follow the rules each time you train your pup.

Before we get into the ten tips on puppy training, I just want to touch on the Puppy Blues. Dealing with a new puppy can be hard, especially if you are a first time puppy parent.  It’s common to feel like you made a mistake.  But it does get better. It’s important to understand that you are not alone. I also went through the puppy blues.  You can see how I handled my own puppy blues in the post on Puppy Blues: Dealing with the Regret.

Here are the top 10 secrets to easy puppy training.

1.Bonding

There is evidence that dogs and man lived and worked together as far back as 14,000 years ago. During this early time, it is believed that wolves would follow hunters in hopes of finding scraps of food. As wolfs and hunters evolved and began to trust each other they started working together to hunt. Overtime wolves became domesticated and evolved into dogs. Dogs would than work side by side with farmers to help protect the flock or kill vermin on the farm. In return they were given food and protected from bigger predators. As you can see the relationship between man and dog has always been a partnership. Not that of a master and servant.

Too often people feel they must dominate over their dog to train them. But if you look back at the history of dogs it shows us that we need to bond with our dogs through a mutual respect.

Now that doesn’t mean you should not be your dog’s leader. A dog still needs to know that you are the leader of the pack. But taking your place as a leader should not be done by fear; instead you want your dog to respect you.

This is where bonding with your dog comes in. When you bond with your dog you create mutual respect. You do this by taking care of them and taking the time to train them. By training them you are also showing them you’re their leader.

Bonding with your puppy does take time. It will not happen overnight. You will know when you have bonded with your pup when they always want to be by your side.

Separation Anxiety

Some dogs can become too bonded with their owners. When this happens they may get separation anxiety when you are not with them. It is important that your dog learns that it is ok to be alone. To learn more about how to prevent separation anxiety in puppies, read our post: How to Prevent Separation Anxiety in Dogs

Example of Bonding

When we first brought home Bella, we allowed her to be on our enclosed deck without a leash. We didn’t realize she was small enough that she could slide through the railing. A portion of the deck is just above ground level so it was easy for her to hop off. One minute she was running around the deck, the next she was running around our unfenced backyard. We called her but she didn’t respond. She was having too much fun running from the kids. Clearly she was not bonded to us. Fast forward to two years later, we can now let her out in the backyard without worrying. Bella will not let us out of her sight. Even if it is just to go around the corner.

2. Puppy Socialization

People tend not to realize just how important puppy socialization is. A puppy that has not been properly socialized will be too afraid to focus on training. Socializing your puppy is also a great way to bond with them. When you socialize your puppy you are taking the time to teach your puppy not to be afraid. This in turn shows them that you will protect them and that you are the leader. To learn more about the proper way to socialize a puppy, please read our post How to Socialize A Puppy – Made Easy

3. Exercise

Getting enough exercise is very important to puppy training. If you have a puppy that is full of energy, they will not be able to focus on training. Always spend some time playing with your pup before getting down to training.

4. Rewards

In the first of the secrets to easy puppy training I mentioned that dogs and people worked together because it benefited them to do so. That is still the case today. Dogs still want to be rewarded for a job well done. What you use as a reward depends on your puppy. Some may like a toy but most will respond to a food reward. For older dogs, praise, a toy or a food treat may all work. Remember it takes time to bond with your dog so food will get a better response then your praise right now. Over time that will change as long as you give praise along with a treat in the beginning.

Since your puppy is still young they will want their reward immediately. When using a food reward make sure it is something your puppy really likes. It should also be something that they don’t get otherwise. I have been told that the worst smelling rewards are often the most liked by dogs. Just don’t give your pup too many food treats at one time.

When rewarding your puppy do it often and generously. In the beginning you will need to break down each request in to small steps. You only need to give them very small pieces of a high value treat but give it each time they do what is asked.

5. Take Small Steps

Young puppies will not be able to master complicated commands at first. Each time you train your puppy break down the command into small steps.

As an example when you are trying to teach your puppy to stay, have them sit and then take one step back. If they managed to stay, give them a treat for staying. Next time try two steps and so on. Soon enough you will be able to leave the room while they wait for you.

6. Only Focus on Good Behavior

Only focus on what your puppy did right. Not on what they did wrong. In other words don’t reprimand them when they do an unwanted behavior during training. Just ignore it instead. By focusing on bad behavior you are rewarding them for it with your attention. If it is easier to get your attention doing something bad instead of something good they will repeat the bad behavior more often. This leads us into our next secret to easy puppy training.

7. Reward Only for the Correct Behavior

You only want to reward the right behavior, not the wrong one. This one is a tricky as it’s all in the timing. Let’s say you give your puppy the sit command and they follow it. But before you give them the reward they jump up on you. If you give them a treat after they jumped up, they will think that jumping up is what is being rewarded. Not only are you rewarding the unwanted behavior but you are also missing the opportunity to reinforce the good behavior. To ensure that you reward the right behavior have the reward in your hand before giving the command. That way you can give them the treat as soon as they complete the request.

8. Use Your Voice as a Training Tool

No dog is born knowing how to communicate with people. They do instinctively know how to communicate with other dogs through sounds and actions. We see this when a dog wants to play. They will bark in a friendly, high pitch sound and lower their head. When they don’t want to be bothered they will growl in a deep voice.

We too can use sounds and actions to communicate with them. When your puppy does something good, speak to them in a friendly, high pitched sound. If they do something wrong, respond with a firm, deep voice. The closer to a growl sound the better. Just remember using a deep voice does not mean you need to yell.

You may learn that your dog is very verbal once they learn to communicate with you. Our dog Bella lets us know what she wants through sound and action. If she wants to play fetch she will let out a loud bark and drop the ball at our feet. When that doesn’t work she will change her tactic by making a pleading whine instead.

9. Say It Once

When training your puppy you should only give the command once. If the puppy does not preform the right behavior, stop for a minute. Then show them what you want them to do while saying the command again. If they are still not listening do something else and try again later. Also make sure everyone uses that same word for each task.

10. Keep It Short

Young puppies have short attention spans so you need to keep the training sessions short. Instead of one long session have mini sessions throughout the day. This will help reinforce what they are learning. If you can, aim to train them for at least 20 minutes a day at 5 minute intervals. The training sessions should be done in different areas throughout the house. This will ensure that your puppy learns the command by sound and not by place.

When possible include training in normal everyday activities like during dinner time. Have them sit while you are placing the food on the floor. If they move before you give them a release command take up the food and start again.

Also everyone in the house should practice training the puppy. That way the puppy will learn to listen to all family members, not just you.

When to Start Training a Puppy

Young puppies have short attention spans and lots of energy so getting them to focus on training can be tough. But you can begin to train them on the 5 basic commands; sit, down, stand, come and stay, as soon as you pick them up at around 7 to 8 weeks of age. Puppy Kindergarten classes are a good way to get started. Just make sure to practice the training when you are not in class.

Formal dog obedience training is typically offered at 6 months of age but you should not wait that long to start training your puppy. The sooner you start, the quicker they will learn what is expected of them. Plus as I already have stated training your puppy is a great way to bond with them.

How Long to Train a Puppy

How long it takes to train a puppy has a lot to do with how much time you put into training them. Training a puppy on basic commands can take less than a month, if you consistently train them, reinforce the commands and follow the secrets to easy puppy training. By the way you will never be done training your puppy. Once they master the basics you will want to move on to move advanced training like loose leash training.

How to Train Your Puppy

Before you can begin to train your puppy on any commands they first need to learn their name. This can be done by playing the name game.

To play, sit in an enclosed area like your kitchen near your puppy but not right next to them. Wait until they are distracted, than call out their name with a bright, happy voice. When they look towards you, say yes and give them a treat right away. Remember the secret training tip #7 and have your treats ready in your hand so you only reward them for responding to their name. Repeat the process a few more times. After the first few times start to mix giving them treats with lots of praise and attention. It should only take a day or two for them to learn to respond to their name.

Once they have learned their name you can begin to train them on these 5 basic commands: Sit, Stay, Down Heel and Come, also known as recall. Recall is the most important command to teach your puppy. It may one day save their life.

Do You Have the Right Tools?

Having the right stuff for your new puppy is half the battle.  Take a look at the 7 essentials you need to care for your puppy in our post What You Need for a New Puppy

Thank You for Reading

10 Secrets to Easy Puppy Training

Here is a list of the posts that were mentioned above:

Puppy Crying in Crate at Night? Here’s Help

Puppy Crying in Crate at Night? Here's Help

Bringing home a new puppy is such a wonderful experience. They are so much fun to play with and they bring a sense of happiness to any home. That is until nightfall comes and it is time to go to sleep. This is the time that people find their puppy crying in the crate. New puppy parents may be at a lost as to why their puppy is crying or how to stop it. Here we will go over some of the reasons your puppy is crying in the crate at night and how you can help them stop.

The Puppy Blues – Dealing with a new puppy can be hard, especially if you are a first time puppy parent.  It’s common to feel like you made a mistake. Let’s face it puppies generally come untrained, can’t understand you and don’t know the rules of the house.  But it does get better. It’s important to understand that you are not alone.  Check out my post on Puppy Blues: Dealing with Regret to see how I managed my own puppy blues.

The First Day in Their New Home

It’s very important that you to start to bond with your puppy from the moment you pick them up from the breeder or rescue. Up until that point your puppy has bonded with their canine family and possibly their human caretakers. But now that they will live with you for the rest of their life, they need to become bonded to you. The quicker you bond with your puppy the less issue you will have with your puppy crying in the crate at night. Here are some tips to start the process off right.

Take Time Off

The best way to bond with your puppy quickly is to spend a lot of time with them. If possible, you should plan to spend most of the day with them for at least the first week. If you work, try to plan your vacation for the same time as your puppy’s homecoming.

Even if you work from home you should take time off so you can concentrate on your puppy. You not only need to be around them, you also need plenty of time to play with and train them. Potty training your puppy is so much easier when you have the time to learn their potty clues and can take them out as soon as they need to go. That means in the beginning taking them outside every couple of hours. Our puppy was potty trained in less than two weeks because we were home to teach her what was expected of her right from the start. To learn more about potty training and the mistakes you want to avoid read our post: Potty Training Mistakes

Bonding with your Dog

There are many ways you can bond with your puppy. The most important part is to pay attention to them. Here are a few way you can bond with your dog:

  • Hand feed them their food
  • Play with them
  • Go for walks around the yard or other safe places
  • Spend time training them
  • Take them for short trips in the car
  • Spend time cuddling with them
  • Socialize your puppy to new things and experiences

Spending time socializing your puppy is a great way to bond with them and also avoid fear issues in the future. To learn more about how to socialize your puppy please read our posts on How to Socialize a Puppy, Puppy Socialization Mistakes and 5 Safe and Easy Ways to Socialize Your Puppy

Preventing Separation Anxiety

Now even though I believe you should be with your puppy most of the time for the first week or two, you do need to start training them to be alone. Otherwise you could end up with a dog that has separation anxiety. For more information on how to prevent separation anxiety in puppies please read our post: How to Prevent Separation Anxiety in Dogs

Crate Training

In addition to bonding with your puppy will want to familiarize your puppy with the crate if that is where you want them to sleep at night. To do this try to bring your puppy home as early in the day as possible. That way they will have the most time possible to get use to the crate.

Remember the first rule of crate training a puppy is to make sure your puppy’s crate is an inviting place to be. Line the crate with soft washable towels or a washable bed meant for a crate.

Keep a watch on your puppy to make sure they do not chew on the bedding. If they do start to chew on the bedding it is best that they don’t have it in their crate.

Try to place the crate in a quiet area that is still near where you are during the day. We placed our puppy’s crate in the corner of our living room. This location allowed her to watch us from her crate even when we were in the dining room or kitchen. Of course she had a clear view of the entire living room.

I also suggest using an exercise pen that attaches to the crate like the one shown below. This will give your pup the freedom to go in and out of their crate without feeling confined to the crate.

For more crate training tips check out our post on How to Crate Train a Puppy: 10 Mistakes to Avoid

As an Amazon affiliate I earn a commission from qualifying purchases.

Exercise Pens

Here is a Midwest Foldable Metal Exercise pen connected to a Midwest crate. The combination of pen and crate creates a safe place for your puppy to stay when you can’t watch them. The Midwest Foldable Metal Exercise pen can be found at Amazon.com

Teaching your Puppy to Want to Be in the Crate

In addition to making your puppy’s crate inviting, you need to train your puppy that it is a good place to be. You can do this by giving your puppy a high value treat every time they go into the crate. Just make sure to only give that high value treat when they go in the crate. Use a different treat for other types of training.

Another way to help your pup associate her crate with good things is to feed them in the crate. This works best if you have a dog that is food oriented. Our pup is not food oriented so her regular food did not motivate her to enter her crate. In fact we found ourselves handfeeding her for the first week or so before she would eat on her own.

To find more tips on crate training please read our post: Crate Training A Puppy – Made Easy

Why is My Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night?

Ok, so it’s the first day of your puppy being home and you followed all the crate training advice you found. But now that it is night time your puppy is crying in the crate and you don’t know why.

We will go over a few reasons why your puppy is crying in their crate below, but a common reason is that it is all new. Think about it. During the day your puppy was happy to have all your attention. He didn’t mind that his canine family was not there. He was too busy exploring his new home, playing games and learning the rules of the house. But now that it is nighttime he is starting to miss the comforts of his prior home and family. On top of that he is expected to sleep in a crate all by himself. There is a good chance that this is the first time in his young life that he needs to sleep alone or in a crate.

Here are some other reasons why your puppy is crying in the crate at night:

Afraid to be alone

Dog are pack animals. When dogs lived in the wild they would stay with their families until they were fully grown to keep them safe. So it’s only natural that they would want to stay with their families now. But that does not work in today’s society. Traditionally, puppies are placed with their forever homes between 7 and 8 weeks so they can bond with their new family before the fear period starts. Understanding this will go a long way to help you have the patience you need while they go through the transition from one home to another.

Not enough exercise during the day

Puppies need about 18 to 20 hours of sleep a day. But when they sleep will depend on you. You should monitor how much sleep your pup gets during the day. If he is sleeping all day, chances are he will want to play at night.

Overtired

Although you don’t want your puppy to sleep all day, they do need naps throughout the day. Otherwise you could end up with an overtired, stressed puppy.

Puppy needs to go to the bathroom

If your puppy has been sleeping, but is now crying in the middle of the night, they most likely need to go to the bathroom. Take them outside and give them time to go. Once they have gone bring them back to the crate with little or no talking.

Too much time in the crate

If your puppy has spent a lot of time in the crate during the day, they are not going to want to be there at night. Limit the amount of time your puppy is locked in the crate. Using an exercise pen like the one pictured above is a great way to keep your puppy safe without locking them in their crate.

Crate is not inviting

As I mentioned above it is import that your puppy finds the crate a nice place to be. Make sure it is not too warm or too cold and that they have enough space to move around some. There should be enough space for them to spread out their legs or curl up. Most crate training advice tells you that the crate should just be big enough to lie down in. We always gave our pups more space than that. If the space is too small they will not want to be stuck in it for any length of time.

If you are using towels or blankets in the crate it might not be comfortable enough for your pup. Try adding a crate pad to make it more comfortable.

But keep watch for signs of your puppy possibly chewing on the towels, blanket or bed. Although many puppies will appreciate the softness and not destroy it, some puppies will chew on anything. Ingesting the fabric can be fatal.  If you think your puppy will chew on their bedding make sure to give them a firm bed with a fitted cover that is chew proof. Though for some puppies this may still be an issue. You will need to keep them close so you can watch them.

Also do not leave your puppy in the crate alone for any length of time if they have soft bedding. 

We prefer to use only USA made dog beds due to concerns over toxic chemicals found in many imported pet beds. If you feel the same way Big Barker makes a 4″ thick Dog Crate Pad. This pad is thicker than the midwest crate pads, giving your pup a inviting place to sleep. The heavy duty, waterproof, tear resistant and washable crate pad is made in the USA with Certi-PUR US® certified foam. It is available at Amazon.com

Another option is the MidWest Super Plush Pet Bed. These beds are not made in the USA but they are well rated and made to fit into the Midwest crates. The beds are completely machine washable and a good option if you have a Midwest Lifestages crate.  But may not be a good option for puppies that will chew on it. You can use a smaller sized bed in the crate while you have the divider up.  Once they are grown you can get a full sized bed for your pup.  You can find the Midwest Deluxe Pet Beds at Amazon.com

Midwest Deluxe Pet Bed at Amazon.com

Not enough time to get use to crate

Although we all dream of having a puppy that loves their crate right from the start, it is not reality for most people. It is going to take a few days of playing games and training your dog to be comfortable in the crate before they will go in willingly and not cry.

Tips to Stop a Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night. - Happyooldes,con

Tips to Stop a Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night

The solutions to stop a puppy crying in the crate will depend on the reason they are crying. Here is a list of reasons and the recommended solutions:

Need to go out

To make sure your puppy is not crying in the crate because they need to go to the bathroom, take them out 1 hour before bedtime and again right before you place them in the crate. Do not rush their potty time. You want to make sure they are done.

Puppy not tired

Plan out your bedtime routine starting two hours before you want to go to bed. During this time make sure your puppy gets plenty of time out of their crate. Also spend time training them and playing with them. You want your puppy to be ready to go to sleep when the time comes.

Puppy is overtired

After you spend time training and playing with them, spend about 15 to 20 minutes of quiet time with them before putting them into the crate. Sit beside them while softly petting them. The idea is that you want your puppy to feel relaxed before putting them in the crate. You can also play some soft music to calm your puppy at night.

Afraid of being alone

As I mentioned above not wanting to be alone at night is a common issue with puppies during their first few nights in their new home. Although the issue is common there is no one single solution that will work for every dog. Pick the solution from the list below that you think will work best for you and give it a try. If that doesn’t work move on to the next one until you found something that works for the whole family.

Solutions for puppy crying

  1. Have them sleep in their crate next to your bed.  You will need to go to bed when they do.
  2. Place the crate on an elevated surface next to your bed so it is even with your bed. This allows your puppy to feel like they are next to you.  Of course you need to be careful that the crate does not fall.
  3. An alternative to the elevated crate is to sleep on the floor next to the crate.  Again the idea is to be close as possible to your puppy. 
  4. If your puppy does not like the crate door closed you can try sleeping in front of the crate with the door open.  Use your body to block the opening.  Make sure they cannot get out when everyone is asleep.
  5. Use a nightlight so your puppy can see you.
  6. Ask for a blanket or toy with your puppy’s mom’s scent on it to comfort them the first few nights.
  7. Place a sheet over the crate to make it more den like.  This might help your puppy feel safe in the crate.
  8. If you don’t want to sleep next to them you can sit by the crate talking to them until they fall asleep.
  9. Try playing soft music to claim your puppy at night.
  10. Using ticking clock to simulate the sound of a heart beat can help to make your puppy feel like they are not alone.  Also giving them a safe hot water bottle wrapped in a blanket can help soothe them.
  11. A modern version of the ticking clock and hot water bottle is a heated toy puppy like the Smart Pet Love Snuggle Puppy.  This toy uses a mechanical pulsing heartbeat and heat pack to make your puppy feel like they are sleeping with another puppy.   Although we did not know about this toy at the time we got our puppy, I have heard great reviews from people who have used it. 

The Smart Pet Love Snuggle Puppy

Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night? How to Make it Stop? Try the Snuggle Puppy. Picture of puppy sleeping Snuggle Puppy Toy

The Smart Pet Love Snuggle Puppy was created to simulate sleeping with other puppies. The Snuggle Puppy has a heartbeat and disposable heating pad making the soft plush toy feel life like. You can find the Smart Pet Love Snuggle Puppy at Amazon.com

How we stopped our puppy from crying in the crate at night

On her first night home we tried the common “Let Her Cry” method of getting her to stop crying. It didn’t work. She cried throughout the night in between periods of sleep. The second night we tried again but gave up after a half an hour. Instead my husband decided to sleep in the kitchen with her. We had the kitchen puppy proofed and gated the doorways so she couldn’t go anywhere. She slept through the night on her bed next to my husband. She only woke up once during the night to go out. My husband sept in the kitchen for the next week He started out sleeping on the floor right next to her but moved to the kitchen bench after the first two nights. She remained on the floor in her bed near him.

During the day we worked on her getting use to the crate. We would place her in the crate for quiet time. After a week we tried to get her to sleep in the crate again. This time she cried a little but went to sleep in less than 5 minutes. She was still waking us up at night to go out but would go back to the crate without crying. In the end our solution was giving her the time she needed to become comfortable with us and the crate.

How Long Should I leave my Puppy Crying in the Crate at Night?

The first puppy we crate trained took to the crate quickly and only cried a little the first night. Our current puppy wanted nothing to do with sleeping in the crate at night. The first night we tried to let her “cry it out” which resulted in her crying on and off throughout the night. If I could do it over again I would not let her cry for more than 10 minutes. Some puppies are just not ready to sleep by themselves the first few nights in a new place.

Allowing her to sleep next to my husband the first week and then transition to her crate worked better for all of us. It is just not worth the stress you put on a new puppy when you force them to sleep in a crate before they comfortable with it.

I highly recommend that you use the first couple of weeks to bond with your puppy. You will be rewarded with a dog that wants to please you all the time.

First Time Puppy Parent?

Let us help you. Check out these posts on what you need to know before to make life easy with your new puppy.

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Puppy Potty Training Mistakes

Puppy Potty Training Mistakes

What You Need to Know BEFORE You Get a Puppy

House training (or potty training) is the number one concern new puppy parents have when they first bring home their puppy. No one wants a puppy that pees and poos on the floor. Or worst on the rug. Plus getting pee and poop out of carpet is not easy. So it’s no wonder that people are concerned with getting the process right. But puppy potty training is not that hard in reality.  It just takes time and dedication to house train your puppy. However there are mistakes that people make which make potty training harder than it has to be.  You may be surprised to hear that the biggest potty training mistake happens before you even get your dog.  Join us as we go over the puppy potty training mistakes you may be making and tips on how to avoid them.

Puppy Potty Training Mistakes

  5 Puppy Potty Training Mistakes to Avoid

1. Not Getting a Puppy from a Reputable Place

Where you get your puppy will have a big impact on how easy and quickly your puppy will house train. 

Quality Breeder

Puppies that come from quality breeders start their potty training before you take them home.  These breeders only breed in small quantities so they have the time to begin the potty training process.  They also tend to keep the puppies longer.  That allows the puppy to learn the proper way to behave in a house from their moms.  Plus a quality breed will have the puppies in their home so they start to learn the rules of the house at a younger age.  However finding a quality breeder is hard and can be expensive.

Puppy Mill

If you get your puppy from a pet store or online chances are you are buying a puppy mill puppy.   Puppy mill puppies are much harder to house train. This is due to the living conditions they are born into.  Puppy mill puppies are raised the same way farms raise livestock.  In mass quantities, outside, packed in small crates with their mother and siblings.  These puppies have nowhere else to relieve themselves except in the crate.  They are basically trained to go in their crates, near where they sleep.  This is the exact opposite of how crate training works. The concept of crate training is based on puppies not wanting to soil where they sleep. But if they have already been taught to go in their crate you are facing an uphill battle.   You need to un-train what they have already learned before you can retrain them the right way.     

We learned this the hard way.  We first brought home Molly at four months old. At this point she was old enough to hold her bladder but after living in a puppy store for two months and in a puppy mill before that, going in her crate was the only thing she knew.  Thankfully she learned quickly that there were other options than going in her crate.

Rescue  

These adorable 9 week old puppies were available for adoption by Saving K9 Plus

Getting your puppy from a rescue group is also a good option. Since rescue groups use experienced dog owners to foster their dogs they start house training your puppy before you adopt them. In our case our current rescue pup lived in a foster home with her mom for 6 weeks before she was old enough to be adopted at 9 weeks old.  During this time the foster mom started training Bella and her siblings.   All we had to do was keep up the training.   Bella only had a few “accidents” in the house and was fully house trained in just a couple of weeks.   She even learned how to tell us when she needed to go out.

2. Not Bonding with your Puppy

You may wonder what bonding with your puppy has to do with potty training. I am sure you have seen the stories of dogs that will not leave the side of their sick or dead owner. This is because the dog has bonded with their owner. When you have a strong bond with your dog they will want to listen to you and please you. This includes going to the bathroom outside if that is what you ask of them. A puppy that has not bonded to you may be more independent thinking and do as they wish.

Bonding does not happen overnight. It does take some time. But you should work towards bonding with your dog at the same time as you work on potty training them.

How to Bond with your Dog

You can bond with your dog by:

  • Hand feeding them
  • Playing with them
  • Taking them for walks
  • Training with them
  • Taking short trips with them
  • Spending time cuddling with them
  • Socialize your puppy

To help you learn more about How to Socialize a Puppy we have put together a series of posts on socializing a puppy

3. Not Paying Enough Attention to Your Puppy

Ask any puppy parent what is the most important thing you need for your new puppy and they will tell you time, lots of time. One of the biggest potty training mistakes first time puppy parents make is underestimating just how much time it takes to train your puppy. It is important to make sure you have the time to dedicate to potty training in the beginning or you may be dealing with accidents for a long time.

It is so much easier to teach a puppy the right way to do things rather than trying to stop unwanted behaviors. To do this you need to know what they are doing at all times. When it comes to potty training you need to be ahead of them. What I mean by this is you need to know when they need to go out before they go in the house. Before Bella was fully potty trained she would sneak off to do her business in a quiet place. I think she knew she wasn’t supposed to go in the house but she didn’t know how to tell us yet. The few times she did go in the house were because we stopped paying attention to her.

Keep watch for signs that they need to go. Look out for whining, especially if they are near the door; pacing; circling; sniffing the ground or as in my case with Bella wondering off to be alone.

Just remember that it does get better. Puppies will require most of your time in the beginning. But after they learn the daily routine and they can hold their bladders longer they require less of your time. That doesn’t mean you can ignore them just that you don’t have to watch their every movement anymore.

4. Not Sticking to a Schedule

Puppies are creatures of habit. They love routine and it helps them learn the rules of the house. A schedule will also help you remember to take them out every couple of hours. When you are creating a schedule that works for you remember to include these items:

  • Take your puppy out first thing in the morning and last thing at night.
  • Plan when you will feed them. Talk to your vet to determine how often they should eat.
  • Take them out 15 minutes or so after they have eaten or drank.
  • For the first month they will need at least one potty break during the night. Depending on the pup it may be more.
  • Include multiple playtimes and training times in your schedule with potty breaks before and after.
  • After creating your schedule make sure you have scheduled a potty break at least every two hours during the day for the first month. If an accident happens in between potty break times shorten the time.
  • Don’t forget nap times in the crate. This is when you get me time without worrying about your puppy. Take them out for a potty break before placing them in the crate and as soon as you take them out.
  • Limit the amount of time they are in the crate. They cannot learn the rules of the house if they are in a crate. Also too much crate time will result in them wanting to play when outside rather than potty.
  • Remember to cuddle with your puppy.

The above schedule might seem extreme, but your goal is to keep them from going in the house. Once they learn they need to go outside and they can hold their bladder longer you can increase the time between potty breaks.

5. Using Pee Pads

Another one of the more common potty training mistakes is using pee pads. I have to admit I did buy them when we first brought Bella home thinking that was the right thing to do. But after a couple of days and accidents I realized that the potty pads was just confusing her. If you take them outside to go to the bathroom often, you will not need the pee pads.

When you think about it the whole idea of pee pads is rather counter-intuitive. You want to teach your puppy to go outside but then you tell them it’s ok to go inside on a pee pad. It is important to be consistent with your puppy’s potty training. If you want to teach your puppy they need to hold it until they are outside never encourage them to go in your house. Even on a pee pad.

While I would skip on the puppy pads there are 7 essential items you do need for a puppy

Final Words on Potty Training Mistakes

It will only take a couple of weeks to potty train your puppy, but with a little patience you will be rewarded with a lifetime of happiness. To learn more please read our post on Potty Training a Puppy: Made Easy

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